Thursday, October 28, 2010

Justice Liberals of America

I haven't read "Decisions", but I figure I can still spot the members of the Justice League of America who are miffed that health care reform didn't go far enough...

Green Arrow & his Merry Men(Oliver Queen, Connor Hawke, Roy Harper)

Black Canary (Dinah Lance)
A left-leaning feminist moderate. She was the daughter of a detective and a vigilante with the JSA all serving as "uncles." I think she retroactively hooked up with Ollie as part of her rebellion, and picked up something of his politics, although she's comparatively apolitical these days. Under Sarah Byam, though...

Green Lantern (John Stewart and Kyle Rayner)
A former black militant and a freelance artist with as many gay friends as straight? Duh duh. I don't care how much Johns tries to sell John as a jarhead, Stewart listened to Steisand, and his immigration policy is really, really tolerant.

Batman (Bruce Wayne)
One of those scary, fascistic Democrats that gives Rush Limbaugh night terrors. The Joker is the new Willie Horton. Batman has devoted his life to combating amoral capitalists, while himself a liberal elitist with deep pockets. In favor of gun control, counciling over imprisonment, welfare programs, and has occasionally even taken over the media through hi-tech means.

Wonder Woman
A Hillary Clinton "It Takes a Village" type, perfectly willing to send the troops after WMDs, then personally investigate issues with child support payments for her low-income friends. The most inclusionistic leader of the JLA in history, without regard to race, creed, color, gender identity, power level, general lameness or planet of origin.

Aquaman (Orin/Arthur Curry)
An unpopular reformer amongst his people, with some viewing him as a criminal and outsider. Victim of religious persecution from dangerous fundamentalists. Married outside his dimension, adopted a boy who turned to sorcery, soft on crime, and constantly struggles to keep his citizens and military from instigating conflict with neighbors.

Martian Manhunter (J'Onn J'Onzz)
An admitted Communist, the second and longest-term inclusionist JLA leader, opposed to the death penalty in even the worst cases, and constantly at odds with conservatives Hawkman, Blue Beetle, Booster Gold, Captain Atom and Triumph.

Zatanna Zatara
A stage magician and member of the Detroit-based Justice League who practiced tantric magic with John Constantine. Didn't she shoot one of those "Rock the Vote" videos for MTV that helped elect Bill Clinton?

Black Lightning (Jefferson Pierce)
Though part of the Luthor Administration, still a tireless social reformer focused on equal opportunity through education.

Mister Miracle (Scott Free)
After decades spent on Apokolips, you couldn't really call him a liberal. He's most concerned with the happiness of himself and those nearest to him, but even still, he can't rest easily when others are not as free as himself. A moderate.

Vixen (Mari McCabe)
Immigrated from a chauvinistic African country torn by civil war to the United States? Became a far-famed fashion model and super-heroine? Fought "entrepreneurs" and took over the Justice League? Oh yeah, total red stare nightmare.

Plastic Man (Patrick "Eel" O'Brien)
A reformed thief whose best pal/sidekick is also a reformed thief, and who had a child out of wedlock and shows more leg than most heroines. Hoover must have been dyspeptic.

Steel (John Henry Irons)
Formerly part of the military-industrial complex, but firmly rejected and has consistently combatted it. Also, his grandparents matched with MLK.

Geo-Force (Prince Brion Markov)
Self-righteous Euro-trash, but still left of the West.

The Flash (Jay Garrick)
Slightly more metropolitan that Barry and Wally, don'cha know? Contrasts Alan Scott's conservativism with his optimistic New Deal vibe. He was hanging with Wonder Woman's J.L.A. while Alan was bashing Jared Stephens.

Fire (Beatriz da Costa) & Ice (Tora Olafsdotter)
You know Bea's a Hugo Chavez fan, right? As for Tora: Environmentalist. Animal right activist. Bleeding heart.


Animal Man (Buddy Baker)
Like Ice, but less a bleeding heart.

Blue Jay (Jay Abrams)
Ditto, though I'd say less concerned about PETA than GLAAD.

Lightray (Sollis)
He's from New Genesis. They're all about the Great Society.

General Glory (Joseph Jones)
A New Deal/Yellow Dog Democrat, not unlike the Marvel Comics model.

Tasmanian Devil (Hugh Dawkins)
An Australian poof. He'd damned well better have been a liberal.

Rocket Red 4 (Dimitri Pushkin)
Was communist loving freedoms of assignment in Land of Opportunity! What a country!

Crimson Fox (Vivian and Constance d'Aramis)
French. Need I elaborate?

Nuklon (Albert Rothstein)
He took a hard right turn for a bit there, but he's still a nice Jewish boy who spent most of his time in the JLA with Fire and Obsidian.

Obsidian (Todd Rice)
An unsteady Dem, as he was raised by Midwestern sociopaths, but finally stopped being so emo and came out of the closet.

Amazing Man (Will Everett, III)
Like Will Everett II didn't march and have a picture of Kennedy and/or Johnson on his wall?

Blue Devil (Daniel Cassidy)
He's one of those "Hollywood" types. Not counting Jon Voight and Kelsey Grammer.

Icemaiden (Sigrid Nansen)
A Norwegian lesbian with a thing for Fire. Do the math.

Moon Maiden (Laura Klein)
Such a product of '60s Camelot, how could she not?

Ambush Bug (Irwin Schwab)
A "Boll Weevil."

See "Wonder Woman"

Starman (Mikaal Tomas)
Bisexual illegal alien who turned against his militaristic society.

Vibe (Paco Ramone) & Gypsy (Cindy Reynolds)
I'm not going to make an equal opportunity joke, I swear.

I have to say, the republican list was more surprising, and of a higher quality. Maybe it's about historically uptight DC skewing right wing?


Luke said...

I don't know about "higher quality," because you've got two of the "Big Three," two more Founders, and 2 more "longtimers" in GA and Canary; never mind that you also have two of the most respected GLs in both fandom and in-character, and one of the most respected (IC) and successful (RL) heroes of all time in Jay Garrick. Like I said earlier, I'd throw Wally West in there, too. Then consider the large swath of Bronze- and Modern-Age characters who round out the crew and I'd say the Left side is pretty solid as well.

The only one which raises my eyebrows is Geo-Force. Eurotrash for sure, and a monarch at that. (As WWE Hall Of Famer Junkyard Dog once said, "This country never had no king, this country never had no queen, and the only person the JYD ever bow down to was the Good Lord Above.") But his law-and-order approach, coupled with his militaristic ruling style and "might makes right" attitude skews him Right in my book. Geo-Force was and is not afraid to use lethal force, something which sometimes put him at odds with his mentor. The fact that he has no morphed into a hated monarch has got to add cred to the Righty argument, considering the book is being written by a Leftist, right? ;)

You know the old saying that Liberals will go down fighting but Conservatives will down compromising? Some of my favorite DC heroes (Steel, Black Lightning, Aquaman, Manhunter, GA Flash) are on this list. Geo-Force, too.

Diabolu Frank said...

Superman, both major Flashes, the Green Lanterns with their own series, plus cool veterans like the Hawks, Atom, and Firestorm.


Batman, Wonder Woman, the two Green Lanterns sharing a series, Aquaman, and Martian Manhunter plus wimpy veterans like the Green Arrows and Black Canary.

Captain Atom and Power Girl stack up pretty nicely against Zatanna and, what, Plastic Man? Steel? Black Lightning? C'mon!

Sir, I assure you, any Outsiders you want to claim will be released with blessings.

Aside from *snicker* Geo-Force, did I get any of your favorites wrong? Personally, I get a kick out of doing the Atom blog in part because of how clearly opposed both its stars are to my politics.

LissBirds said...

I'm staying out of this one (okay, not really)...but I always thought J'onn was above politics in general. I'd call him socialist rather than communist considering the line about Castro being a communist and J'onn's reply saying, "that's not really communism."

Actually, I'm going to rephrase that and give J'onn his own political party and call it communalism. Seeing Martians as more advanced than us, they should be above politics and instead define themselves by ideals, not ideology, much like late 1700's Enlightenment thinking.